Being Still while waiting on God
At the beginning of each year it seems that God gives a heads up on what the year will be like. Last year He told me to clear my plate, that there was going to be a lot going on. Oh boy, if it ever was. You can read more about it here.
This year is a year of being still. We are half way through the year and as each day passes by God is guiding my husband and I in the direction He needs us to go. Right now this is a mental and spiritual path. After overcoming last years trials and coming out in victory, we are being refined. He has put us in positions in other peoples lives to be a light and speak truth, while our business and personal lives are at a place of stillness.
You have to know my husband and I, we are dreamers, big ones, and we like to act on these dreams pretty quickly. Sometimes we fail, sometimes it leads to something else, sometimes it is a success. We are a very good team in that we balance each other out and work as one. Just as it should be. But this year we have to put ourselves on hold and not make any sudden moves, or act on what we feel. This is a big task for us. We are very independent and are always busy doing something.
We each have an area that God is refining in this stillness. I envision the ocean when I think about where we are at. This tide is always going in and out, part of its daily routine, but at times a storm rolls in and stirs up the waters and makes them rough, then there are times that everything is still, peace and quite. We are at the calmness of the sea right now. Our daily routine is the same, but there are things happening beneath the surface. For me I am learning how to parent, not only my kids but the foster kids we have in our home at this time. This is why God has given me this time of being still, because if I had bigger things on my plate at this season, I would not be able to hear and fulfill what God is teaching me right now. This is where we get ourselves in trouble. We put to much on our plate then when its time to dig in you can’t settle on one thing and give it our all. This is a big problem I have. God is teaching me to only focus on the task at hand. Right now it is my kids.
We are foster adoptive parents. We got our daughter when she was 10 days old, then we got our son last year in March, which just this past week we received the decree of his adoption, yahooooo! and a little over a month ago we took in two foster kids, brother and sister. Most people would be like slow down girl, that is too much back to back, But really it has been all God. He knows what I am able to handle mentally, when I got the phone call at 10 at night about the foster kids, my first response was no way, I just adjusted with my son. But my heart took over and the spirit reminded me what our calling is. We prayed for the 2 hours waiting for their arrival that God would give us strength and that we would not run into major problems with my kids and adapting new ones, God also knows my emotional level and that I can loose it quickly, so I prayed that with these kids would come peace.
There is so much power behind prayer, God heard me loud and clear and has blessed me with two amazing kids, they are so calm, respectful, helpful, and there is much peace. I am still dealing with my two, which I knew was going to be an adjustment for them, especially my daughter, she wears her feeling on her sleeve and is very spirit lead. My son is all boy, which is a different creature that I am learning to adjust to every day. This has been very difficult for me over the past year, I can’t believe how different they are and I feel lost most of the time when it comes to my son. But God is working on me day by day.
Just days before writing this I got great word from God in this stillness. We are here to disciple our children, not to discipline them. We want our kids to be well mannered, respectful, god fearing, and loving, who doesn’t right. Well as every parent knows there comes a time when you have to get firm with your kids and let them know you are in charge and they are not adults. Well that has been my battle here lately with my 4 year old turning 16. And my son who is in his terrible 2’s they call it. So between the both of them I feel like a donkey on edge half the time. I hate that!
I have a bible study I have turned to multiple times in my child rearing days. Spiritual Parenting, by Michelle Anthony . This book and video series are amazing. It has helped to keep me grounded on what my true purpose in parenting it. So making reference from this book when I am going through a trying day, or week with my kids I seek first in charge, God. We have just had a wonder but trying trip to the mountains for Memorial Day weekend. This is the first trip to take the foster kids on, which they loved by the way, and we were needing to get away from everything we had going on at work, oh yea and did I mention we are getting our house ready for a wedding. So it was a well needed break. Well my kids were out of control attitude wise. They were misbehaving so badly, I felt bad for the other kids cause they couldn’t fully enjoy cause we had to deal with meltdowns, sassyness, and time outs. By the time we got home I wanted to checkout and hid in my room forever. God knew I was at a breaking point with trying to deal with my kids, I feel like a ping pong ball with them in that I cant get any consistency. If it isn’t one its the other or both.
Well God has opened my eyes with having two other kids around, one you have an extra set of eyes on you and two they are very well behaved, I think I scare them with my two that they are afraid to misbehave. I know there is something different about my kids, they both come from bad birth situations and I speak against any harm that could come against them as a result. So in returning to our normal routine the following day after our trip, I was addressed by the director of my sons preschool. She told me that I have a special kid. My respond was sarcastic “Yea, he’s special all right”. She was very quick to correct me and go into telling me about her son. She gave me so much insight and encouragement. We had been having bad reports from his teach for some time now and I didn’t know how to handle the situation any further then what I already had. But his director assured me that it was okay and that they were working with him and that he was special. I left there rejuvenated. They follow day God lead me to more passages and encouraging works.
I will focus more on bringing my children up in the word of God then trying to have them fit into this mold our society has created. I don’t care what chart they don’t fall under or what level of speech they are not at or if they live in a fairy tale world and everything is make believe for them. These are the children God created, their past situation does not define them but makes them who they are in God’s eyes. All He has asked me to do it to love them, and to bring them up in the fear and ammunition of the Lord. I will disciple my children and the other children in my home but letting them see what a God fearing woman, mother, wife, business owner, and friend I am.
Being still means that you listen and see what God is trying to teach you at this moment in time. He is teaching us to build up and equip us for what is to come and for our eternal home.
Now for my husband, God is leading him into being the head of our house, a leader in our community, and an elder in our church. Over the last couple years he has really made some major changes in how he sees himself and his relationship with God. Through that he has grown so much in the fear of the Lord. We had done a study in our church at the beginning of the year about who God has called us to be as men and woman in our homes; Beautiful Design by Matt Chandler. It has really taken an impact in our house on how I honor my husband and how he has really filled the role of being the head. He has also been able to hear from God in bigger matters that are effecting our church. Our business has been in a rough season with employees and moral, before my husband would have been responding negatively and making the situation worse, but he is very calm and is evaluating what is going on around him to better address issues in a godly manner. We turned our business over to God as a ministry in 2011 and we have looked at it that way when it come to dealing with our customers and employees ever since. We are there to speak into their lives, not just provide a service and draw a paycheck. With that comes many battles when you are working for the Lord, the devil is always lurking around waiting to take his next prey.
Pray has been a very big part of our stillness. Everything is out of our control other then prayer. Each time we have ran into a situation prayer has been the only solution. As soon as we pray, God reacts. There is tremendous power behind prayer. I, more times then I like, try to fix the issue myself first, but I am learning quickly that I have to go to the one who knows all, sees all, fixes all first and save myself the headache and heart ache.